To le boyfie =)

Day by day, my love for you becomes overwhelming and I can't handle it when I don't see or even talk to you every day. I apologize straight from the heart for ignoring u whenever u make an attempt to make me feel better =( I know I overreact a lot and I'm truly sorry. I‘m ashamed of how I treat you and I'm sorry I've been so moody lately. I'm afraid I'll say something to make you forget the feelings you have for me. I promise you that this is all going to change because I love you with everything I have. I was scared to love you at first, out of fear that you would hurt me...

You are the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me. Each moment that you & I spend together is so magical that I catch myself smiling for no reason at all =D Dear, you make my life so amazing and I don't know how else to repay you but to love you just as much as you love me. The world is a better place to be because of you. I could never imagine what it would be like if we were to lose each other. I don't even want to think about it. All I want to think of is you. ♥

I'm not who I was before

You know what? yes, I have changed. I'm not as nice as I used to be, because I don't want to get used or walked over. I don't trust anyone and tell them my secrets... because behind every fake smile is a backstabbing bitch. I distance myself from people because in the end, they're going to leave! I have changed because I realized dat I'm the only person I can depend on... Usually when I get upset, I shut down. I go silent and I don't talk very much. I'll be in the type of mood dat I hate everyone except like one or two people because the world is full of monsters with friendly faces. They don't genuinely care, they're only curious.

An opening heart to trust

I have had an extremely busy weekdays but still able to read some really amazing posts...I read this and it resonated with me because it was definitely how I felt about trusting anyone again...It made me think hard about broken trust and how it changes me... I was there a short year ago, wondering if I would ever be able to trust anyone again. I never let myself get too excited about dating. I have dated a few persons but no one special, after reading this, I knew why... I had lost my desire to trust and I didn't expect it from anyone anymore...

I don't take promises from anyone anymore

that is what you did to me.

I do not look expectantly at my phone

when someone tells me they'll call

then decide they won't.

and when people come to me with wide eyes and excited smiles

I turn away.

I do not memorize what it's like

to touch a body with just the tips of my fingers.

I remember what it was to train my mind to forget

what skin feels like, traced over

on mornings half asleep and that is enough

to not hold on to promised words

from promising lips any longer

Chanel?

Someone questioned me today : '' Do you think Chanel cosmetics are worth the money? '' Well, Chanel makes very high quality make-up. It's pricey but some of the products are definitely worth the money. Chanel can be the best makeup brand if the products work well on you. Makeup is something very individual. Do spend some time trying out Chanel products at the counter =) Personally my good experiences with Chanel is fragrances, lipsticks, make up base, foundation and eyeliner. I adore their lipsticks because they are so lush and moisturizing! I've been looking for the certain lipstick but unfortunately it's temporary unavailable at Suria store =(

Rouge Coco - Ultra Hydrating Lipstick

addicted...

It Will Rain - Bruno Mars

If you ever leave me, baby,

Leave some morphine at my door

'Cause it would take a whole lot of medication

To realize what we used to have,

We don't have it anymore.

There's no religion that could save me

No matter how long my knees are on the floor (Ooh)

So keep in mind all the sacrifices I'm makin'

To keep you by my side

To keep you from walkin' out the door.

'Cause there'll be no sunlight

If I lose you, baby

There'll be no clear skies

If I lose you, baby

Just like the clouds

My eyes will do the same, if you walk away

Everyday it'll rain, rain, ra-a-a-ain

I'll never be your mother's favorite

Your daddy can't even look me in the eye

Ooh, if I was in their shoes, I'd be doing the same thing

Sayin' "There goes my little girl

Walkin' with that troublesome guy"

But they're just afraid of something they can't understand

Ooh, but little darlin' watch me change their minds

Yeah for you I'll try, I'll try, I'll try, I'll try

And pick up these broken pieces 'til I'm bleeding

If that'll make you mine

'Cause there'll be no sunlight

If I lose you, baby

There'll be no clear skies

If I lose you, baby

Just like the clouds

My eyes will do the same, if you walk away

Everyday it'll rain, rain, ra-a-a-ain

Oh, don't you say (don't you say) goodbye (goodbye),

Don't you say (don't you say) goodbye (goodbye)

I'll pick up these broken pieces 'til I'm bleeding

If that'll make it right

'Cause there'll be no sunlight

If I lose you, baby

There'll be no clear skies

If I lose you, baby

And just like the clouds

My eyes will do the same, if you walk away

Everyday it'll rain, rain, ra-a-a-ain

Attention haters!

Below are some good reasons YOU need to stop paying more attention to my love life than ur own!

Unless u can read our minds, then you have no idea what is actually going on in my relationship. Ever heard the saying don’t judge a book by it’s cover?????? Nah! don’t judge my boyfriend (or relationship ) unless you really know every side to every story. I might complain to my friends when me and my bf fight, but it’s normal for a girl to rant more about that than to gush about when her guy is being wonderful. Even I admit dat my versions of the story can be a lil one-sided when I’m annoyed. If my boyfriend makes me happy ( and he does ), and you’re my friend, then why would you want to change that??? WHY???? Just because you might not like him doesn’t mean he’s not a good guy. Listen! if you’re my real friend, you’ll just be happy that I’m happy. So don’t be a hypocrite! Your friends might have hated your last gf/by, but did that stop you from liking her/him? Probably not kan? Every couple fights, and every couple has problems. Me and my boyfriend’s issues might seem totally weird to you, but it’s something we need to work out on our own without your input!

Like I said before, there are certain times dat u do need to butt into your friend’s relationship. If you have proof that her guy is treating her really badly, abusing her in some way, or cheating on her, then you should absolutely speak up. But if u just don’t agree with her relationship choice, or you just don’t like her boyfriend, than there’s no need for you to get involved.

So please, for the sake of our friendship, stop butting into my relationship! 

My first run

This is just to put on record that I did my first 8km run on the 19th September 2015 

#sehatisejiwa# #kamianakMalaysia#

I didn't do proper warm up before run and now I'm too drunk to walk lol

So I tested the 8km and hey, it wasn’t so bad at all. =)

Commitment

I've got my faith and trust in you. Let's see how everything goes ❀

you always make me feel like a princess ♥

Birthday are incomplete without the ones who love and care for you. Thank you for making my birthday so memorable. Aww I feel I am very fortunate to have someone like you in my life. Thank you dear for the gift and organizing a brilliant birthday celebration for me. You are just so sweet and I love you for being so caring. Thank you for giving me a fantastic birthday gift dear! ♥

Aww ♥ huge Hello Kitty's fondant cake

Sweet lilac rose surrounded with red roses ♥

This made my heart melt ♥

星空 - 林俊杰

你要我看星空，你说星空是无穷， 想不通心太重，夜空的繁星却都懂，你要我看星空，我看了仍是懵懂，你转身一个吻，从今后我不再是一个人。。。

2015

这一年，我懂了。。。日久不一定生情，但一定能够见人心。有的人真的可以为了蝇头微利去出卖自己的灵魂和一切。

这一年，我怕了。。。因为容忍往往被有些人看作是软弱，一个不小心就被伤的五脏六腑都受伤。

    

这一年，我变了。。。更加顽强了，更像一个仙人掌了，随便丢到哪都能活了，对人对事都不再那么偏执了，不再纠结着一个人/一件事不放了。如果我不是你在乎的，你就不会是我心疼的。

这一年生活告诉我：‘‘ 不是每个人都愿意陪你经历所有，人与人之间亲近与否，除了血缘外，不在距离，而在心。’’ 然而这一年，我不想要的是我想要的几倍。这一年，青春走了，我们逐渐老了。。。

无论如何，都告诉自己得一直一直向前。。。

xoxo

Dear♥

Thank you for coming into my life and making me realize that not all guys are the same.Thank you for keeping my faith & giving me strength to move forward =) I have been thru many rough patches in my life. I have had bad relationships and I almost give up on love. People come and go in my life. and most of them leaving me hanging in midst where I'm so down and hopeless =(  But since I met you, everything has changed. You gave me hope. Thank you for taking away all the pain, hurt and sadness I had felt because of my wrong choices in the past. Thank you for loving me despite of my weakness and imperfections. You are the best gift God gave me. I love you so much Leslie♥

我用时间证明了我爱你，你用行动证明了你爱我。

My life has changed for the better...

I spent years with a person that not only broke my heart, but also broke my essence. It amazed me that I entered the relationship thinking I was complete, yet once I left, I saw myself broken. This is the story about a girl who fell madly in love, yet lost her identity. Maybe karma caught up with me..tbh, I was dating with someone else when ''we'' first met. Yet after few years, the relationship began to sour... We’d have the typical arguments...some lil things like not cleaning the house/replying texts/answering calls. The arguments became more frequent and intense. I was no longer the happy-go-lucky girl that went out with bunch of friends. I was supposed to be figuring what I wanted in life, but instead I was trying to figure out how to keep a person in my life. I was dependent on someone’s love!!! 

Our strained relationship finally came to an end..I still remember the day I left, I drove away from the house and cried so badly and blamed myself for what happened. At the same time I really couldn’t figure out where things went wrong? For the first time in my life, I felt like a FAILURE! Afta breakup, I realized that I wasted so much time worrying about one person’s feelings & happiness. I had to find out who I really was. I took a step back and accept the fact that we weren’t meant to be. The experience taught me to think more rationally when it comes to matters of the heart. And now I can proudly say I love the person I am today, because I have evolved into a better person. Breaking up with someone may be hard, but it may also be a push in the right direction. =)

for your sake, silly!

I've learned in my own personal situation & watching my friends go thru theirs, no matter how much you make someone a priority in your life, if they only treat u as an option u gotta leave them. Nothing is perfect 100% of the time, but when both people are willing to put in the work, a loving relationship with a deep connection is the prize at the end of the day. A relationship can only last as long as BOTH parties want the otha involved. 

Life is too short to play with people's emotions, that’s how people get hurt and nowadays get killed. If you know that your heart is not in the relationship or don’t see it going anywhere, pls STOP BEING SELFISH!!!!!! JUST LET THEM GO!!!!!! 

黑色密码

冷淡会耗尽一个人所有热情，尽管曾经是那样的真实而炽烈。。。

一件黑色毛衣

两个人的回忆

雨过之后更难忘记

忘记我还爱你

你不用在意

流泪也只想刚好合意

我早已经待在谷底

我知道不能再留住你

也知道不能没有孤寂

感激你让我拥有缺点的美丽

看着那白色的蜻蜓

在空中忘了前进

还能不能重新编织

脑海中起毛球的记忆

再说我爱你

可能雨也不会停

黑色毛衣

藏在那里

就让回忆永远停在那里

It's all about timing

Every person will need to find four people in their lives :

The 1st person is you, the 2nd person is the one you love most, the 3rd person is the one who love you most and the 4th is the one you spend the rest of your life with. 

Firstly you will meet with the one you love the most and learn how love feels. Because you know how love feels, so you can find the person who loves you most. When you have experienced the feeling of loving others and being loved, you will know what is you need the most. Then you will find the person who is most suitable for you, to be able to spend the rest of your life with. But...in reality, these 3 people are usually not the same person...The one you love the most doesn't love you, the one who loves you the most is never the one you love the most. And the one you spend your life with is never the one you love the most or the one who loves you the most. He is just the person who happens to be at the right place at the right time. 

No person will purposely have a change of heart. At the point in time when he loves you, he really loves you. Same goes, when he doesn't love you, he really doesn't love you anymore. When a person doesn't love you and wants to leave you. You must ask yourself if you still love him, if you also don't love him anymore, do not keep him just to save your pride. Love is not possessive, if you like the moon, you can't just take it down and put it in your basin.

In other words, when you love a person, you can use another method of possessing the person. Let him become a permanent memory in your life. If you really love a person, you must love him for what he is. Love him for his good points, and the bad. You can't wish for him to become like what you like him to be just because you love him. When you really love a person, you cannot find a reason why you love him, you only know that no matter when and where, good mood or bad mood, you will wish to have this person to be with you. 

Real love is when 2 people can go thru the toughest problems without asking for promises or listing criteria. You have to put in effort and give in at times, and not always be on the receiving end in a relationship. Being away from each other is a type of test. If the relationship isn't strong, then you can only admit defeat. Good luck readers =)

没事，我很好。

朋友关切的问我：‘‘ 最近过的怎样？’’ 我回答：‘‘ 还好吧！’’。对于这种如此直白兼不经大脑思考后的回答，其实是我最诚实的答案，因为我真的不知该怎么回答她，既不想随便地敷衍过去，也说不出任何的所以然来，而我的朋友似乎能察觉到这三个字背后隐藏的故事。

我不是一位善于言谈的人，很多的时候会选择沉默和隐藏自己，但是我却偏偏很喜欢与她之间的那种很随和，不做作的聊天方式。虽然很多时候我们的对话和问答都不在同一个频率上，但我们之间那种互相倾诉/倾听的感觉很愉快。她是其中一个可以让我卸下所有心理防备和顾虑的人。

我和她说自己总有一种什么事情也没有做的疲惫感。。。她说别给自己那么大的压力，活的开心才最重要！我说我最大的问题就像很多人说的那样，想的太多而做的太少。。。我也不知道自己是怎么了？在好长的一段时间里走着走着。。。就把曾经的那个有热情、有憧憬、有干劲的自己弄丢了，有时觉得很迷惘，然后会不断地回头，设法把自己重新找回来。

这一路走来我见识过很多人，也经历过很多事，有人给我帮助，有人给我挖坑，在看清现实的面前，我需要时间去适应，去调整自己的状态，去接受和完善一个不完美的自己。不管我以后变成了什么样子，我的内心和骨子里依然是倔强的，我可以放慢脚步，但我从没有放弃过自己。我明白没有一种生活是十全十美，也没有任何一种工作是不受委屈的。

no pain, no gain

No time for the gym? Well that's no excuse. I've made it possible to workout anytime & anywhere =)

I'm lazy and in a strong, long term relationship with my bed. I tried to create the habit of exercise but wasn’t successful. Each evening there were too many temptations & reasons to skip the exercise. I was an expert at thinking of good reasons to not workout xD One day I realized how much of my time was wasted in bed so I decided to take action! getting up early is the perfect time to do exercise =)

The benefits of morning exercise that I have experienced is I feel empowered and my stress levels became lower. Bodybuilding feels horrible at first. I remember my arms felt like falling off when I first lifted weights, However, my body adapted to it after couple of weeks. 

Get a life!

You’ve been trying to get my attention for some time now. I have ignored your friend request on Facebook because I DON’T WANT TO ENGAGE IN ANY DIRECT CONTACT WITH YOU WHATSOEVER! lemme make it veryyy publicly clear bcz I know you obsessively and constantly checking my post.

I HAD ZERO INTEREST IN YOU. If a zero could be (-)negative, it would be negative zero to the power of infinity. 

DO NOT respond to this post to defend yourself! NO POINT! and DO NOT attempt to talk to me if you see me in public.

For your sake, I hope YOU get some mentally help. For my sake, I hope YOU finally get it: STOP STALKING & JUDGING ME. Get a life! kthxbye!

趁早

送给你，那个走进我心里却没留在我身边的人。

到后来才发现爱你是一种习惯

我学会和你说一样的谎

你总是要我在你身旁

说幸福该是什么模样

你给我的天堂 其实是一片荒凉

要是我早可以和你一刀两断

我们就不必在爱里勉强

可是我真的不够勇敢

总为你忐忑为你心软

毕竟相爱一场 不要谁心里带着伤

我可以永远笑着扮演你的配角

在你的背后自己煎熬

如果你不想要

想退出要趁早

我没有非要一起到老

我可以不问感觉继续为爱讨好

冷眼的看着你的骄傲

若有情太难了 想别恋要趁早 就算迷恋你的拥抱忘了就好

爱已至此怎样的说法都能成为理由

我在这样的爱情里看见的 是男人的软弱

我可以永远笑着扮演你的配角

在你的背后自己煎熬

如果你不想要想退出要趁早

我没有非要一起到老

我可以不问感觉继续为爱讨好

冷眼的看着你的骄傲

若有情太难了想别恋要趁早 

就算迷恋你的拥抱 忘了就好

imperfectly perfect 1:1

I'm not perfect. I'll annoy you, make fun of you, say stupid things, over think everything, but you'll never find someone who cares you as much as I do =)

无情不等于滥情

这几年來学到最多的不是如何得到什么？而是学会如何面对失去，放手和拒絕。过去的我总执着要得到成就和掌声，可最后却发现得到的同时却失去了平衡。以前的我就是一个不折不扣的「滥好人」，交朋友也沒什么局限。但是后來发觉这根本不是我要的生活，我并不想花时间在一些交淺言深的人身上，也不想浪費时间和精力在一些有的沒的聚会，所以我慢慢开始学习拒绝。。。随着年龄的增长，细数身边真正的知己好友也就那几个，所以我想真的不需要刻意花时间去结交一些我本來就不那么在意的朋友身上。过去的我曾遭受朋友背叛而感到失落，也因为家世背景而被朋友消費。於是我开始学会把拒绝说出口，一开始有点艰难，但后来真的感到生活轻松许多。同样的，在感情上我也不懂的拒绝，所以每次尽管很想分手都没勇气开口，非得拖到最后对方和我分手。后来我发现，与其这样拖着只是因为不知道怎么拒绝，到不如勇敢说出口更轻松。

我觉得分手就该无情，不需要假裝当朋友，频繁联络，还要关注对方的动态，因为这样只会让你走不出來，真的没必要强迫自己跟对方当朋友啊，毕竟你也不缺他啊！我是一个分手后可以马上和你断绝联络的人，我不会苦苦纠缠，而且还会渐渐忘记有关对方的人事物，因为对我来说，过去就让它留在过去，慢慢遗忘就好。我必须活在現在、响往未來。对于失去的感情，一点也不念旧。一段感情里，如果对方真的爱你，真的在乎你的感受，他应该对其它不该爱的人无情，不该去理会前度，更不应该有暧昧对象。我前男友会有事沒事陪前女友买醉，逛超市，搬家等，我想说她是沒有朋友吗？非得要你帮忙不可吗？不需要表现的这么「情深意重」吧？社会上有更多需要你幫忙的弱勢族群。你既然这么有情，我就只好無情了。以前的我，被伤害了会很难过的问：‘‘ 为什么这样对我？’’，‘‘ 为什么骗我？’’，‘‘ 为什么不理我？’’。。。我会为了这些难过糾結好久，但后来发现对方根本一副事不关己的态度，那我干吗还要问为什么？如果说这就是成长的代价和历练，那么现在的我绝对不会被伤害了还要问为什么 ？更不会为了不爱我的人而难过，我会在知道事情的真相后马上大步离开，绝不让自己有被二度伤害的机会。因为感情不应该这样被糟蹋的。你不喜歡我，你不爱我，你讨厌我，OK！我也不在乎，我知道我自己的价值，我不会因为你否定我而否定自己。

我常说人生要浪費在美好及重要的人事物上。至于那些你不爱的，不爱你的，不重要的，就通通丟进资源回收桶。所以现在的我朋友虽然少了，我却不失落，因为我选择让自己无情，然后把「有情」放在真正在乎我的人身上。我更懂再也不需要去当一个什么都好的人，我不需要去应酬，也不必执着于每个人都要喜欢我。我选择忽略，刪去，不再放在心上，因为对于某些人，我不需要用感情。

Hi September ♥

WeeWee0823

I woke up this morning and apparently it’s September!!! I'm glad that August is over. This past month was a rough one for me with many bad days & few good ones =) So September, you better be bringing me a lot of sunshine and rainbows ♥